*achoo*

Cars that park themselves, phones that are smarter than we are, and all my files are now able to live on a cloud. Viagra, butt implants, lazer hair removal, organ transplants but STILL no cure for the common cold!! wth???

Things I have discovered while laying in bed sick this afternoon:

#1 - when I sneeze I do a sit-up. only a few more and my workout for today will be complete
#2 - lots of meds and playing FB games seems to have the same effect as drinking too much wine
#3 - hot soup should never be consumed in bed when you own three 10+ lb cats who like to jump on the bed to snuggle with you

Life is moving soooo slowly as I watch daytime TV zip on by.....

Anybody else long for the days when The Weather Channel showed just weather? ...or is it just me?? I don't want to hear about the Golf Course Pick of the Week (brought you by Dell) or see what weather topics are trending on Twitter, I have a Twitter acct for that! I also do not to "re-live" hurricanes of years past. I was there, I remember them. I just want to know about Irene!!!

Good thing I don't have children

One of my neighbors just found my cat & brought him back to me...
 (1) no windows are open and I haven't left the house today
 (2) I didn't even know he was gone!!!


Now the return of the fat ball of furry occurred just I discovered that the wonderful meal I prepared for dinner, and have been eagerly waiting for is still raw, because I didn't turn the oven on


If I had kids, tonight they would be lost and starving...

Neither rain nor sleet nor diseased legs...

remember that postman's oath? Neither rain nor sleet nor gloom of night...
Well I would like to propose a re-write to that. How about neither laziness nor stupidity will keep me from my appointed rounds.
I have a mail man that won't check my box for outgoing mail unless he is delivering mail to me. So what happens is that if I have a letter to go out?, it sits there until I get mail.
Now let's think about this.

mailboxes come with flags. those flags have the SOLE purpose of communicating to your faithful postal employee that there is mail to be mailed out, right? (or do I live in some "Mirror" Star Trek universe where everything is backwards)
SO I put the question to you, the general reader, why would it now be an official policy of the United States Postal Service to not require the mail-person ( I'm trying to be P.C. ) to check mail boxes for outgoing mail unless they have incoming mail for that address?? He puts mail in my neighbor's box --right beside mine,-- sees my flag is up and what does the mail-person do?
They blatantly ignore it!!

I think we should all tear off those stupid little flags and demand a partial refund of the purchase price of our box because we got charged for parts we don't need. And don't get me started on the rising stamp prices, because the way I view it, we are paying more for less service
I'm thinking of printing up t-shirts and starting a revolution....
(I wonder if this is where the term "Going Postal" started???)

 Moving on:

I'm not the type of person that gets offended easily, but every once in a while someone does manage to offend me. This week however I was highly offended.
In talking with a state employee about a personal matter, I mentioned that my main mode of transportation was by foot, and coming to the office was not nearly as convenient and she made it out to be.
This woman, (who will not remain nameless because she pissed me off) Marie Whitlock - which she spelled for me apparently assuming that using phonetics was a foreign skill to me) questioned me as to how I expected to  [do what we were discussing] with no car. I told her that anywhere I needed to go I walked to, including my bank, the grocery store, the post office (because remember I have outgoing mail issues) etc. Her tone of voice and unfortunate choice of verbiage is what set me off.  The tone she used was as if  having legs was the most horrid disease known to man. OH MY GOD! I had no idea! Where did I pick up such a ghastly ailment. Could it have been from that man I passed in the store yesterday? Oh my God ,yes, that must be it; he had legs too! DEAR GOD CALL THE CDC!!!  The virus has gone airborne! Sound the alert. Activate the National Guard! Shields up, Mr. Scott, set Phasers on stun!

So without missing a beat and in my best dead-pan ever I told her that, "You know, it's the damnedest thing! When my mother gave birth to me I was deformed, I had two, strange things growing out of my hips. No one one wanted them cut off, because of the high price of surgery so they taught me how to balance myself on them and it turned out to be pretty useful. I figure that God gave them to me, so I will use them."

She told me I was being rude. (Me? Rude? imagine that!) I went on to inform her "... I promise you that I am in much better shape than your fat ass that sits behind a wheel encased in metal everywhere you go.".
 Then I asked for her supervisor and made my complaint..

I never knew that being a pedestrian made one a pariah in today's society. I have never felt as diseased and dirty as when Marie Whitlock spoke to me like that.

Today I wad told "being married isn't so bad if you don't think about it"
LOL

Maybe that's my problem...

walk a mile in my shoes

Today I walked 4 miles.

4 miles in the sweltering heat! was I mad?? had I lost my mind? No. I've just lost my job and transportation. So I am left with no choice but to walk where I need to go. Usually it isn't so bad, but today it was 100 and 3 freaking degrees outside. (or so the many bank thermometers told me along my journey) 

After about 5 minutes into my little jaunt  I was drenched! My hair was dripping sweat into my eyes, my shirt was stuck to me with the tell tale ribbons of wetness tattooing my shirt all down the front and back.

I even had a nice little wet spot on my pants so it looked like I'd pissed myself. LOVELY!

But all of that I can endure, because I'm doing what has to be done. 

What I cannot endure are the looks that I get as I'm minding my own business walking down the sidewalk. 

What? Has the population degraded so much that it is unthinkable to see someone using the two legs God gave them? 

Is it that unimaginable that a person walking in the heat will sweat?

Well, to those gawkers I say: 

WALK 4 MILES IN MY SHOES 

Just a little sage advice: never keep your tube of toothpaste and tube of Icy Hot in the same drawer... I'm just sayin' :)

remember that "new job" of mine that I so proudly added to my list of new things? 

Well it sucks! I should have started regularly working ages ago, but there have been nothing but technical problems! Ya see, it's a work at home/outsourced job. I should be merrily typing away, answering the phone in my pjs on a daily basis dealing with idiot customer who call in for service on the cell phones, but from the giddy-up it has been nothing but a headache. "the system is down" or my network log on doesn't work correctly etc. 

I am at the point of pulling out my eyelashes one by one. I just can't seem to catch a break. Not only have a spent money getting this all set up and paid for training, but I've also had to install a home phone line that I didn't need as well as my own internet (my apartment comes with free wi-fi, but I can't use wi-fi for this, I have to be have an ethernet connection) and now am incurring bills that I didn't have to worry about before and wish to the good Lord above that I didn't have to worry about now because, being that I haven't been working, I haven't been getting paid either. 

So here I am STILL stuck on the measly pittance the Security Employment Commission doles out to me each week, wondering how I am going to get by in what was suppose to be a new start for me.

people, I tell ya, things are bleak. 

Living at the beach is not all it is cracked up to be.

Jobs are scarce when you have to look for something with in walking distance. I take that back, good   jobs are scarce. I could work in one of the many beach stores that are here for minimum wage, but that is not full time work, in a few months the season is over and and I'm right back where I started from. (not to mention that beachwear retail is how I ended up in the pickle of no job, no car in the first place)

Just once I would love for something to go as planned. I would love to get up each day dreading to go to work. If only just for something to do. Cabin fever is setting in and let's face it, I haven't much sanity left to lose ...

so on today's stupid thing that happened:

I was in a store shopping for , well that doesn't matter, I was in a store shopping...

On my way to the register I noticed that their a/c unit was pouring!! water onto the floor; when I get to the checkout I tell the cashier (a boy no older than 15/16 I guess) & tell him about the damage of the clothes on the rack under the a/c vent and the massive puddle. He replies, "All I can say is Oh well, I leave in 5 minutes." & starts ringing my stuff up. REALLY? what the heck is wrong with kids today??  

Granted I have noticed that teens today are definitely the "Me Generation"  - not caring about anything until it directly affects them, but he could have at least called for his manager to let them know. Sure, he probably thinks its a shit job, but (1) you gotta start somewhere and (2) you should at least take some pride in your job no mater what it is. If you are a pig castrator, chop with pride or not at all I say :)

Now that I think back on my money problems, I probably should have gone back down that aisle and "slipped" LOL 

But that would make me no better that half the people I complain about in this world. 

I would rather be poor and be able to face myself in the mirror than shopping til I Drop with money i didn't earn (Ahem! IE the lady who sued McD's over a hot cup of coffee)

Ack! it's 4am!!

Off to bed with me, Lord only knows what tomorrow/today will bring, but if it's interesting I'll post

I was talking the other day with someone about a girl we grew up with (that wasn't what one would call a "looker") who had recently gotten engaged to be married. I asked them If they could get married what is wrong with me? to which the other told me "most people just settle, where you do not."

Later that evening it struck me funny as I reflected on the conversation that there is a colloquial phrase "to settle down" - and I laughed because when people are said "settle down" they get married. I do tend to be very particular where the other sex is concerned and have oft said I do not settle for what I consider sub-standard,so I guess I will never be one to settle down....

Let me talk a little bit about needy emotional people. You know the kind., those that "can't go on this way" the ones that feel that they must make everyone else around them miserable and cranky just like them.

Not everyone wants to get caught up in your little black hole of despair. Sure, we all have our problems and we all need someone to turn to when we have these little upsets. I just recently invite a friend who was down in the dumps to come hang out and have a change of scenery.That same person just stormed out in a huff not more than 5 minutes ago. I suspect it is more because the whiny brat didn't get their way and I refused to quarrel and argue with them about the same old argument that they just refuse to move on from.

 We all do not "release" or deal with them in the same ways. I for example hold things in. I put my little worries in a box and file them away until I can better deal with them.  I do have my little meltdowns from time to time, but I do not project them on others and I do not force people to deal with problems they way I do.
There are some out there who like to beat the dead horse. If I say I don't want to talk about something, then leave me be. Don't get an attitude or throw a tantrum directed towards me because I don't want to talk. If I don't want to talk, I don't want to talk. Trying to guilt me into talking isn't going to work either. You will not change who I am and I will not be susceptible to the gravitational pull of your emotional black hole.
I do not care about your "needs" you have never cared about mine, so they way I look at it we are even.
Is that evil? or is it just the way of the world and something you need to grow up and face?

I am good and G** damned tired of people thinking that my sole purpose on this Earth is to entertain them. There are certain people who only call me when they are bored or need something. Never to just call to check up on me, make sure that I am stilll here, see if there is anything they can do for me. Nope! instead what I get are calls or IMs or emails or voicemails telling me that I need to wake up because it is after such and such time and I should be awake.

well ya know what? This is MY life. I get up when I feel like it, I am not subjected to any other person's idea of "time to be awake". When I turn off ringer or don't answer messages, Don't keep needling me and re-dialing till I answer. And for damn sure, don't you finally get me to answer and then have the nerve to tell me that you are pissed at me because I get angry at having been waken up before I meant to get up. 

It's not like you had something important to tell me like someone has passed away, or been in a horrible car wreck. you only want me to be awake to amuse and entertain you because you are bored and have nothing better to do.

My life is simple. I don't have to be tied to a clock to punch in and out at predisposed times. If i choose to stay up til 3 am watching TV or I happend to still be awake when the sun comes up because I can't sleep,  SO BE IT 

You don't get to tell me that 'normal' people talk to each other in the day light and "[I] don't belong here."

'Cuse me??? I don't belong here?  You must be mad! I belong anywhere I decide I belong. 

If you want entertainment, don't call me. I'm not an entertainer by trade. 

If you want friendship, then I'm here. But friendship is a 2-way street. If you want me to be receptive to you be receptive to me. 

When I call with problems, let me talk; let me get it off my chest. Don't instead try to "one up me" with your problems. I don't mind hearing about what issues you have going on in your world but for heavens sake don't act like you are the only one with problems. And let me add this, if I tell you, for example, that I have one day left to live, don't tell me that you stubbed your toe and understand how I feel. I'm not asking for sympathy on my hypothetical impeding death, but rather just to tell someone what I'm going through. I don't need for you to come up with something simliar to try to "soothe" me. 

I have had enough of people trying to "guilt" me into their way of thinking, their deluded sense of what is right and what isn't. I have never fit into a mold before and I'm sure not gonna try squeezing into one now!

God gave me a brain of my own and I will make decisions as I please. If you don't like it, goodbye.

I no longer care what anyone thinks about me. I'm tired of living for other people. No one else seems to want to live for me, so why should I twist myself into knots trying to please and pamper and cater to them?

I had a conversation with The Widow today.. (The Widow, for newcomers, is my mother)
It has always been a bittersweet relationship that she and i share. Not that much different from Mommie Dearest. I as have gotten older (my age will not be mentioned) I can see that all these years I have driven myself crazy trying to win the love and affection of a LUNATIC.
That woman is seriously off her rocker. I cannot fathom how she has managed to get the her age with some of the backwards things that she does and thinks. I also do not honestly know how I am the fruit of her loins??? I am nothing like her. I am caring an respectful and (for the most part) have common sense.

So for this Mother's Day weekend I raise my glass to all of those who have mothers that they can look up to love and respect. I also hold the highest esteem for the mothers that took the time to sacrifice their own happiness and  time and lives to raise their children and not run from responsibility.

If you know me, you know that weird and fanciful things happen to me. I have often said I would write a book, chronicling these tales. the book probably wouldn't sell, but it was always just a joke..

on the other hand (there is always that "other hand" isn't there?) blogging might be fun, so I'm giving it a try.

beginnings...

I have always been scared of change, frightened of a disruption to the little life I have carved out for myself.

I have had a lot of new beginnings, and a lot of starting overs, each time hoping that that would be the last time.

but maybe somehow the universe knows that the path I've been set on won't meet my standards and gives me an "out".

In any event, here I am again starting over. new home, new job... 

only not everything is new, I'm not new, I'm still me. I sometimes wonder if the circumstances aren't the issue, but I am the issue. NAH! that can't be it. I'm perfect. (ha ha) seriously though, I am far from perfect. I have my faults the same as everyone else. I like to think that it makes me unique and I truly know that there is not another one like me in the world. 

In this new life that I am venturing into, I hope that I learn from the wrong turns I have taken in this maze and finally find myself and also, find myself happy at last..

Wish me luck, as I'm sure this will be an "interesting" journey 

(interesting in that there are bound to me more than one retarded thing to happen to me along the way)